This Week's Prayer...

Lord,

Let me start by thanking you. This week you have provided good sleep, good weather, and good conversation. Thank you for unexpected phone calls with old friends that fill my soul and remind me of who I am. Thank you for shitty pop music that has made paper writing so much more enjoyable. Thank you for giving me a body that bends and breathes and stretches and dances. 

All that said, I am tired. I am trying to hold on to all of these blessings, but really I just want to take a three day nap. And yes Lord, I realize that would be a coma and not a nap, but it does not change my desire for it. I’ve been restless and lonely and longing for something that I can’t quite put my finger on. Things seem to feed my soul and drain it at the same time. Lord it’s really hard to care for your children when it often feels so one-sided and like no one is reciprocating. 

But I know you have a plan and a purpose and better than what I can conceptualize for myself. So I pray for the continued ability to rest well. I pray for comforts in this season of life that I did not initially choose for myself but I seem to be in regardless. I pray that the things that seem to be burdening my heart become lighter. And most importantly, I pray that you give me the eyes to see your people the way that you do. All I want to do is love others well. Generally that means through cookies or cups of coffee. I am okay with both. Please grant me more opportunities to take care of others as I know that their current seasons may be holding the same amount of fidgeting and discomfort as my own. 

Your mercies are new each morning and each day you find a new way to love me as the hot damn mess I am. On days when it does not feel like it, please remind me that is enough. Amen.